I do however have a dream.
There are shops dotted around the UK called 'Poundland', where everything for sale, is not surprisingly a pound. There is always one joker who asks 'How much are these?'
There is an odd mix of items contained within these shops and I have this glorious dream that by some freak of ordering, a collection of baseball cards find their way into the storeroom. Not really knowing what to do with said items and not at the desperate stage of throwing anything on the shelves, they are kept deep within the stockroom.
I need to know and always ask 'Do you have any cards?'
I cannot walk past one of these shops without diving in, its drive my wife mad. I do the same with TKMaxx, imagining a bored shop assistant distracted, careless....bemused, taking delivery of a box or two of Topps or Bowman thinking it is a new brand of stomach medicine. As I said a dream but you never know.
On a recent shopping trip to Canterbury, a large Poundland beckoned me inside. A quick stroll down a few aisles, past hygiene items, gardening products and rows and rows of batteries my heart sinking as nothing remotely resembling baseball cards leaps from the shelves. Then I come across a selection of books - Wayne Rooney's autobiography, Unsolved Mysteries, The Worst Album Covers in the World...EVER, enough cookery books to cook for the rest of your life...
What's this? Tucked behind 'Being Jordan' ( the frank and open story of topless model , sorry glamour model, Katie Price's rise to fame and fortune) Is that a baseball bat? Why yes it is. A sole hardback copy of Stephen King's Faithful. A chronicle of the Boston Red Sox's historic 2004 season for a pound. I had to ask.
Yes...sir...it's a pound sir, everything in the store is a pound...sir. I pass over my pound.
The nearest I have been so far.
I will never doubt the dream.
Never will I walk past a 'Poundland' or similar discount shop again.
Soon I will walk away laden with a selection of baseball cards.